This Will Be the Omake
by DezoPenguin
Summary: A collection of drabbles and humor fics too short to stand as one-shots starring the cast of RWBY. May include both stories set in canon and AUs.


**Omake Week 2014, Day 4:** _I don't actually have an omake collection for _RWBY_, this in fact being the first true omake I've ever writtenfor the series. Perhaps this will be the start of a trend!_

~X X X~

Weiss Schnee was not a morning person.

In fact, Weiss Schnee was the kind of person about whom folks that dredged themselves out of bed at the sound of a blazing alarm, shambled zombie-like to the kitchen where by pure instinct they operated the coffee maker and slurped down enough caffeine that they could, with surly mumbling, prepare themselves for the day and stagger out the door with just enough energy to get to the coffee shop for their second cup would say, "Wow, she's really not a morning person!"

Since coming to Beacon Academy and joining Team RWBY, though, Weiss had become an early riser. Thus, when one morning she found her eyelids fluttering as she gently eased from sleep into wakefulness, her body happy and content with the small amount of rest it had gotten, she was very confused. _Am I back home? No, there's Blake and Yang's bunk beds over there, and Yang's poster on the wall…_

This was very strange. Yang Xiao Long was a loud person, but usually had the social finesse to only crash about and wake up sleeping people when she actually wanted to do so. As for Blake Belladonna, well, she was as quiet as some very quiet thing that someone would mention in an obviously tortured attempt to avoid comparing Blake to a cat. But Ruby Rose was a completely different story. Ruby would inevitably be up, bright and peppy and full of energy, while dawn was still doing its warm-up stretches in preparation for the crack of dawn. And then she'd drag her team awake, hauling them all up and out of bed with shouts and cheers and whistles blown two inches from a sleeping person's ear (and thank Dust that Aura protected against hearing loss), exclaiming all the while that a beautiful day was being wasted. She was like some mutant superweapon designed by a team of mad scientist roosters.

Now, Weiss and Ruby's first class that day was Professor Port's lecture at 10:00, so there wasn't any _reason_ to get up early. Even breakfast was hardly an attraction; hearty morning meals were for people who were actually awake enough to operate a fork, so Weiss was not at all _upset_ that it was quarter past nine.

But it was _strange._

She was just getting out of bed to investigate this phenomenon (and because there was no coffee within arm's reach), when the door swung open and Yang sauntered in.

"Hey, Weiss, still not dressed?"

Ordinarily, Weiss would have responded to the perceived slight with a snarky comment, but she was still too confused to really focus on her impeccable interpersonal skills.

"I just got up. Do you know where Ruby is?"

"I'm right here, Weiss."

The voice was hoarse and almost guttural, the words slow and drawn out, completely unlike Ruby's normal high-pitched chirping. But it _was_ emanating from behind the pink curtain surrounding Ruby's bed.

"Ruby? Is that you? Why are you still in bed? Breakfast ended over an hour ago!"

"I…don't feel too good, Weiss. I don't think I'm going to make it in to Professor Port's lecture this morning. Can…can I copy your notes?"

"Of course you can, but Ruby, that isn't the important thing. What about _you_? Are you okay? Do I need to get the nurse? What are your symptoms?"

"Those are good questions," Yang said, stepping over to her desk and picking up a polished chunk of yellow-brown rock she used as a paperweight. She weighed it in her hand, getting the balance of it, while saying, "Now, if you ask me, my best guess is Ruby's got a bad case of faking it."

With those words, Yang fired a fastball pitch at the ceiling.

It will be noted that the arrangement of ropes and knots that held Ruby's bed suspended over Weiss's basically all depended on a single peg embedded in the ceiling to hold it up. From a construction standpoint, it was really surprising that Weiss could get to sleep at all. Nonetheless, the peg was very strong and seemingly capable of bearing several times the vertical force brought to bear on it by the weight of the bed, Ruby, books, and possibly a small hippopotamus if Ruby ever got the taste for exotic pets.

The _horizontal_ force of, say, a five-pound rock smashing into its side at high velocity, that was a different story.

The pin was jarred sideways, wrenched free of the ceiling, and Ruby Rose suddenly found herself moving in a sharply downward direction.

"Gahhhhh!"

Weiss winced as the bed crashed noisily onto hers, spilling a fully-dressed Ruby out onto the floor.

_I'm really glad that Aura protects against hearing loss._

It was in that spirit that Weiss chose her tone of voice to respond to what had happened.

"What is _wrong_ with you? Do you realize how much _damage_ you could have done?"

"Hey, hey, hold off there," Yang said, holding her hands up placatingly. "Remember? Aura? You two fell a couple of hundred feet off of a giant flying Grimm a few weeks back. A three-foot drop, with a soft mattress under her, isn't going to hurt anything. Except for my little sister's irresponsible attempt to skip class with an act that seriously hasn't fooled me since she was eight…without a good reason that involves her team having fun."

"But he's so _boring_," Ruby moaned. "And Weiss gets mad at me if I don't just sit and pay attention!"

"I wasn't talking about _Ruby_," Weiss snapped, and even if she had been she certainly wasn't _now_ that her character had been attacked. "I'm talking about my bed, which definitely does not have an Aura and which has just had another bed dropped on it. I am _not_ going to end up camping on the floor tonight because of you two dolts!"

"Um…" Yang stammered.

"_Well?_"

And so it came to pass that Weiss ended up taking notes on Professor Port's lecture for an absent Ruby after all. Indeed, she also had to let Yang copy them as well. As for the Rose-Xiao Long sisters, they spent the hour engaging in a variety of cleaning, carpentry, furniture repair, and interior decorating activities, that Yang definitely did not consider to be a fun sisterly bonding episode.

For her part, Ruby still enjoyed it more than going to class, so she counted "Operation Sick Day" as a complete success.


End file.
